Walk on Water OR Drowned?

I wake up and jumped out of my bed this morning, not because I have to prepare myself to go for the interview and the fact that I'm overslept. But because I remember one thing : my friend will face a surgery at 10 A.M. this morning and I haven't call her to support her.

I called her to her cellphone, but I thought she had turned it off. I bet she's on the way to the hospital. A bit of a guilty feeling because I'm not being a good friend that called her to say a prayer, or at least something that encouraging her to face this situation bravely, suddenly hit me. I just pray for her shortly after that.

Then a friend of mine SMS me and said that she will go to her hometown tomorrow. I'm so shocked because I haven't had any chance to visit her since she gave me a shocking news about her pregnancy! (this because she hasn't get married with her boyfriend). I was very concerned about her situation and again I felt guilty because I didn't have any chance to visit her since two weeks ago.

And what's more? I have an interview at a famous International NGO at 10 A.M. and still, I haven't prepare well for the interview. I just read few articles about the nutrition field that I had left for months, suddenly I didn't feel that I am a true nutritionist...

All the way to the NGO's office that located in Blok M, I didn't read my papers again. I even can't read my Bible as I usually do in the bus. The thoughts of my friends surrounded my mind and I felt sorry that I can't be a good friend to them. I just pray along the way that they will be all right.

Then I have to canceled my plan to stay in another town, Bogor, in my old friend's house because untill now I haven't decide what I should do in this kind of situation.
I called some old friends about a lodging to stay overnight, but I didn't have assurance. So, I just chat with them though I used my bro's cellphone. Sadly some of my friends had laid back from the LORD in many ways. And because of that I felt sorry for being too ignorant and selfish for all these times.

It seems that this day is a day that will determine my life and the life that people around me. It just like I'm walking alone in the sea of uncertainty and the water had already covered half of my body. I'm feeling cold, I'm afraid, and the sea seems so threatening, but yet, I have to go on and try to walk on water, no matter what lies before me.

But will I make it? Will I walk on water? Or will I drown in this sea?